I AM ALL THAT I AM

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BOTTOMS UP

Journeys tend to define us rather than the purpose we started the journey off in the first place – Amar Delon

A COMEDY OF LIFE

or

TO LOOK AT LIFE LIKE A COMEDY

YOU DECIDE !

PREFACE

For those of you who picked up this book thinking, ah yes, a book to help me with my wine selections or any other alcoholic beverages, for those who picked it up thinking, ah.. a book on picking up women or men, for those who picked it up just because the word bottom was on the cover and you secretly wished it would have pictures or information about “bottoms”, I am truly sorry to disappoint you.

IT’S NOT !

If at this point you decide to put down the book and go buy that self help book or a Da Vinci Code book, well, it’s been pretty fun right up to here. So wish you all the best.

For those who have continued to read beyond the last paragraph, for goodness sake, do the right thing. Take the book to the counter and pay for it or if you’re reading an online preview of the book, this is right about the time to put in your credit card details and click BUY. Because watching a pirated DVD isn’t the only kind of piracy. Reading the works of a poor author who is trying to make it without compensating him is also stealing. So I am gonna give you guys a few moments here to buy the book first.

Great! I assume that you have bought the book, so now, you have to put up with whatever I have to say, because you have paid for it.

So don’t let it go to waste!

GOTCHA! – Amar Delon

Don’t whine, this is how the rest of the “NORMAL” world works, a world where there are specific guidelines on how to kill women and children, on how to murder innocent people, a world where it’s OK for big corporate giants to steal billions, screw everyone else in the process and a man who is hungry who steals a loaf of bread gets the harshest punishment possible. A world where it’s OK for billion dollar companies to pour toxic waste into the drains and oceans but is not OK when someone litters on the street. A world where women whose only acclaim to fame and success is that, millions have watched their most intimate acts on the internet, a world where it’s OK for little children to idolize these women, a world where religion can be used to mask murders, rape and genocide but is not OK for someone to defend their rights to individuality.

I AM NEITHER NORMAL NOR DO I WANT TO BE.

CHAPTER 1

NORMALCY …. Really ?

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Wake up. Brush your teeth. Poop. Shower. Stop. Soap yourself. Shower. Get dressed, skip breakfast. Struggle through traffic and noise and pollution. Work for 4 hours, hating every minute of it. Anticipate lunch from the moment you clock in. Go to lunch. Eat what you can afford. Go back to work to continue to hate every minute of it. Have a meeting with your boss whom you secretly wish would be struck down by lightning. Suffer through traffic and arrive home. Have dinner. Sleep. Continue this pointless routine for a salary that is just enough for you to continue this meaningless routine.

If you do the above, then you are NORMAL.

Most families, friends and society will expect you to be NORMAL. Being normal is blissful ignorance. Meaning you know what you do or say or eat will eventually cause you so much more pain than this blissful ignorance is giving you. But you want to be NORMAL so bad, to fit in, so you rely on the words of those who have never set foot even for an inch outside of their comfort circles. And then you have these people (FRIENDS, PARENTS, SOCIETY) telling you about world economics, political trend, fashion, entertainment issues and even finance.

Now being a very abnormal person I find that extremely hypocritical and scary to an extent. If someone who guts fish for a living would come and give you advice on surgery you would laugh the person off as being insane. But when someone who is in your circle, but not necessarily qualified or learned in whatever it is that you for some weird reason have decided to get their advice on says something that to them are facts, you accept it, totally blindsided.

Now why is that ?

Because it’s only NORMAL for people to ask for advice from their friends and family.

Listed below are the achievements of ABNORMAL PEOPLE

1.STEVE JOBS – Known as psychotic and deranged to many of his close peers. Revolutionized music and the whole multimedia and the whole computing and video experience.

FOR THE BETTERMENT OF MANKIND

2.HENRY FORD – Was an open ANTI SEMITE. Had a weird personality. Revolutionized modern transportation.

FOR THE BETTERMENT OF MANKIND

3.THOMAS ALVA EDISON –Many who give reports of this man say that he doesn’t seem normal and is extremely obsessed. Gave humanity usable long term sustainable light bulbs and many other inventions. FOR THE BETTERMENT OF MANKIND

And I could continue the rest of this page and book with all this abnormal people and their achievements.

Now lets go to the NORMAL people.

  1. JOE NEXT DOOR – Pays taxes and bills on time. Provides for his family. Never misses a day of work. Achievement? Well nothing much except that he got really sick and his insurance didn’t really cover his bills. So dies leaving his widow and children with bills and mortgages. BETTERMENT OF MANKIND? Not even on the best day of his life.

Maybe not all you normal folks are like this, but quite a few might fit this mould or would eventually fall into a version of this mould.

Now it’s fairly easy to say, hey be different or do something different. Reality may not be the same to everyone, but the choice of being who you are is definitely different for everyone of us. But why is it so important on being different. I mean if everyone who is abnormal becomes normal doesn’t that make everyone normal again in an abnormal way?

Great question, but the answer is simple, NORMALCY that is defined on your own terms and conditions is a better way to be normal. I mean if you feel happy working a dead end job, then great. Don’t try to change yourself for any other reason than yourself. Pressures from people and emotional blackmails from family members, as hard and difficult as they are, are the best kind of virus to kill dreams, hopes and desires. Have you wondered why there are so many miserable people out there in the world today ? They all have lousy families. But that is the thing there is no such thing as a functioning, “NORMAL” family. Everyone is screwed in their own way. It’s how we allow them to affect us that makes the difference.

This is the preview of my next book. When I started writing this, I was in a place where I felt insulted, undervalued, abused, mistreated, unappreciated and worthless. But even in the darkest hour, the lowest moment, the greatest lessons in living is just waiting for you to unearth. This is my gift to all of you my friends. I AM ALL THAT I AM, I AM.

-Amar Delon

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